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I feel very sad today. It happens quite often after I get back from a program. A general sense of rawness, vulnerability.
Not much content or story line that I can discern. It arises and vanishes, seeming to have a life of its own.
Since I just gave a talk on gentleness, I remembered it and thought might be nice to apply it. ;-) Gentleness just lets sadness be as it is, no need to change it, improve it or destroy it. Can I just let myself be sad? Like there’s nothing wrong with that or with me that I feel this way? Approaching it in this way seems to create lots of space around it and it is not so threatening anymore.
Why not be sad? I look at people’s faces, seeing the struggle and pain, masked over with bravado or ignorance. Trying to make sense of our lives, feeling the meaninglessness, the distance from each other and from life that our modern life creates. Covering over our beautiful hearts with armour of discursiveness, always finding ways of not allowing ourself to be loved and to love.
(did i say no story line? sheesh!)

a line from the poem by the Sakyong comes to mind:
You can be sad, for sadness is
the most genuine expression.